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A Proper Lady

Mathew Smith


I don’t really care what that bastard thinks he’s doing, but if he thinks he can screw with my money, then he’s going to be in a fucking world of hurt. I’m in this job for the money, plain and simple! If I don’t get my money, he’s going to have a rude awakening. We may have had some fun together a few times, but that’s all it was, just a few nights’ worth of diversion; he wasn’t even that good anyway. That was for kicks, this is business. I don’t care about him, and I’m sure as hell not some little china doll woman to be used. I know how this country works. The only difference between America and China is that in America, sex isn’t the only way to get what you want. Oh, it helps of course; I’m not stupid enough to think that I would be where I am now if I were ugly, but you can work past that. Here you can use violence and treachery just like men. You can even work real hard and play in the man’s world, but that shit is for chumps. I’m not getting any younger. I need this score. One more job and, then I’m on easy street. Cause with the kind of money I’ll be able to throw around, it won’t matter what’s between my legs; I’ll get respect. That’s another thing that’s not so different between China and America. If you have money, you can piss on anyone you want and get away with it, except in America, it’s a whole lot easier to get the money. Here you really can go from rags to riches, as long as you don’t care about getting your hands dirty.

I’ve done too much to get here. I’ve killed too many people, and I’ve had to let too many disgusting men fuck me, but it’s all going to be worth it! After tonight, it’s going to be “Hello Ms. Leong; how may I help you today?” and “We’ll take care of that right away, Ms. Leong,”, and if that stupid son of a bitch thinks he can take that away from me, I’ll fucking bury him. Don’t think I won’t. I’ll kill him; hell, I’d slit my own mother’s throat if it paid as well as this job is going to. Oh, I know what you’re thinking—I’m just another heartless bitch, right? I don’t give a damn what you think either, but let me enlighten you a little. It’s a cruel world out there. I don’t make the rules, and you know what? I don’t care. What am I supposed to do, change the world? I don’t think so. I’m concerned with me, nobody else. Yeah, I do bad things, and I don’t care who I hurt, but that’s the way it goes. You try to play by the rules and all that you get is stomped on. This isn’t Shangri-La, and all that shit your mommy and daddy told you about being a good person and doing onto others as you would have them do onto you, its just shit. You need to do unto others before they do unto you. That’s the golden rule, and don’t worry about that karma garbage. The only karma is what you dish out in revenge. Yeah, this world is ugly and you’re going to need to be uglier if you want to stand a chance. If you want to deny that, go ahead. Just don’t cry when you find yourself behind the wrong end of a gun. I know I won’t.